how do people on tumblr become so interesting that people actually willingly ask them about their life like i’ve been here for 3 years and i’m pretty sure half of you don’t even know my name
Sometimes I am two people. Johnny is the nice one. Cash causes all the trouble. They fight.
- Johnny Cash
Boys don’t understand the horrible view girls have of themselves
I’ll always reblog this I think
I should show this to guys when they make comments.
no you dont understand how fucking accurate this is.
The view if myself is the view that is the chub jest on my entire body
THE FACT THAT THIS IS CONCIDERED A AFUCKING HORRIBLE VIEW OF HOW GIRLS SEE THEMSELVES PISSES ME OFF AND MAKES ME WANT TO STAB MY BED OKAY
LISTEN TO ME
YOU ARE FIRECRACKERS
YOU ARE A BLIZZARD
YOU ARE AN APOCALYPSE OF LOVE AND RAGE
YOU ARE NOT AND SHOULD NEVER BE DUMBED DOWN TO WHAT YOUR GODDAMN PERCENTAGE OF FAT TO MUSCLE IS
YOU ARE BROKEN BONES AND SCRAPED KNEES AND THROATED SCREAMS AND YOU
IF YOU LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
IF YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
IF YOU THINK YOU LOOK LIKE THIS, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
I AM SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF SEEING WONDERFUL, SMART, TALENTED, WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL GIRLS HATING THEMSELVES BECAUSE OF AN UNREALISTIC EXPECTATION SET ON THEM AT A YOUNG AGE
YOU ARE PERFECT THE WAY YOU ARE
I’ve reblogged this before but I never saw that comment and I’m actually crying omg
That comment was fucking beautiful. I am beautiful. We are all fucking beautiful.
This comment. The picture is perfect but the comment means more than I can explain.
ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD
THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS
YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN
SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.
NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING
NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED
IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGES
thanks for the tip karkat
me at 13: “i’m really mature for my age though”
me at 20: i was a fucking idiot
also me at 20: i’m still a fucking idiot
things to say during sex
- gee whiz
- are you feeling it now mister krabs
- shark bait ooh ha ha
- lets win this for mother russia
- whats your gamertag
- getcha head in the game
- PULL THE LEVER KRONK
i need someone to obsess over me